Chapter 3: The Steep Steps
They set up camp around 100 feet away from the base of The Steep Steps. The massive structure sat silently in the horizon as they discussed whether or not to do a direct assault this time or opt for a more stealthy approach. Sitting around the fire they argued and laughed like close friends while Lazuli sat in the back snickering every so often at her mysterious book. Buzz Buzz, she would pick it up and look at it, snicker snicker, she would set it back down and wait afew minutes. Every so often it would go off again, buzz buzz, and the process would repeat. How I long to get my hands on that little device and see what is so interesting on it.
“MOOOOOO I AM COW LORD” Super Mutant imitated with his powerful voice as they were, once again, reenacting their previous battle. They party laughed and passed around another round of wine from the last endeavor. I took this as my chance to go and examine the structure that they would be raiding. Heading ahead I spotted Shardrin not far from the party apparently having the same idea as I.
Downing a potion of invisibility I headed forth up the stairs of the massive structure. This massive building was similar to a pyramid but rather than a point had a flat section on top. Originally it must have been used for worship or even sacrificing but now it was simply the den of hill giants. Studying the stone I could tell that this structure had been here for hundreds of not thousands of years. Not only that, it was still in fairly good condition with minimal repair done by third parties. After a climb of around 10 minutes I had finally arrived at the top to find one hill giant asleep at the door. They had a small shrine of some sort set up with the rough shape of a bull head. Under it, arranged in stones of course, was the words “Thrk Malton”. I checked my giant handbook and immediately recognized it as “Lord Cow”.
It was then it struck me as to what this was. The fleeing orgekin from the previous encampment must have told them its story. This must be a warding shrine to appease the great lord of bovine! It was so well crafted for the work of a hill giant that I did not touch it. I looked around and found no sign of the orgekin, I assume they have moved onwards towards the Valley of Death where the rest of their kind were assembling. Sneaking in, I looked around the room and saw 5 other giants in the room. There was a massive stack of coins and equipment piled up in the corner and a fire dead center.
Sneaking I check the equipment out along with the gold. From the quality of it I assume this belonged to a previous party of unfortunate adventurers. Digging around I found a small brown pouch completely empty. Looking back at the orges I snickered a little and slipped 7 potions of Cure Light Wounds into the bag. I then snuck out only to find the party at the bottom of the stairs. It seems they have decided upon a night assault so I quickly hid myself in the room.
Peeking over the edge I saw Super Mutant gesturing at the bottom of the stairs then head straight for a mountain beside the temple. The rest of the party headed up the stairs minus both Richard Miz and Lazuli. I quickly found the flying warlock due to their very bright magic aura but Miz was gone from what I could tell. Waiting I heard a loud “MOOOOO” echo through the temple rattling the entire building. Then out of nowhere, well out of Lazuli, came a lightning bolt directly into one of the giants.
I watched as Doktor snuck ahead holding what looked like a jar. Holding it out I watched as the spirit of a hill giant was swapped with the contents of the jar. Thinking back to my classes in Wizard Spells it struck me. Richard Miz was in the jar and now he is in the Giant. That shouldn’t even be possible!?! Nevertheless Miz was now in control of a hill giant. I took this moment of confusion as my cue and scurried out the door only to see Super Mutant fall off the nearby mountain. With a loud thud he hit the ground and I could hear the growl of frustration as he once again attempted this feat.
Peeking back in I saw what seemed to be a small hill giant, the size I would imagine a hill giant baby being, drop from the ceiling and land with the grace of Noctys. It waddled towards a giant and tapped on its leg. Clear as day I heard it say “why are they fighting daddy?” in the most adorable hill giant voice possible. Confused as to where the baby came from but not questioning it to far the hill giant picked it up and ran shouting back to his fellow giants “I PROTECT CHILD!!!” in his loud booming voice.
Following it out the door with my eyes I watched as it headed down the stairs and spotted Super Mutant, finally giving up on his attempt to climb a mountain, climbing up the stairs. At this point I turned to see Sandy once again shouting about his divine cow power and charging in. THWACK! Sandy got hit with a club and went flying into the pile of treasure. He then promptly buried himself in it to avoid further assault. Another lighting bolt went flying in and hit the giant that was assault the dwarf. “FEAR THE PATRONS OF THE COW LORD!!!” Doktor boomed in a loud voice through the temple.
On the other side of the room was Miz who had finally figured out how to maneuver as a giant. With a single move he whacked the other giant on the head. Turning slowly the other giant followed suit and they ended up simply whacking each other on the head back and forth until one fell. Thankfully it was the vile beast and not our ally. That’s 4 down and 1 to go I thought right as Super Mutant charged through the door and assaulted the last giant. Slashing away violently with his weapon he chopped up the giant in a matter of minutes. It seemed that the failure of mountain climbing had filled the orc with enough rage to solo a giant.
Meanwhile in the forest a giant was running with its child. Fearing for its life and more importantly the life of the poor child that he had somehow, by himself, spawned into being made him realize how wrong he was to work for the bad guys. He reevaluated his existence and immediately promised himself to be the best father ever. He decided, in that moment to always… Noctys slipped out of the giants arms and clambered up a tree. The giant continued, completely not noticing as he made promise after promise out loud reassuring the child he believed was there.
I took this as my chance to slip down the stairs, still under the cover of invisibility and fly. Slipped back to my mini-camp I had set up I opened up my bag and prepared a scrying bowel. Tuning to the party I watched as they looted the treasure and congratulated each other for a job well done but this was not my focus. I slowly tuned it back to the giant that had got away and watched.
The giant ran nonstop for hours until it finally reached the next encampment of stone giants who were hunting. He told them of the attack and the legend of the great Sir Loin of Beef and told them the tale of the child he had spawned into creation. Although I wish to recount his tale in a most elegant of manner I feel quoting him directly would be more insightful to you dear reader.
“MOOOOOO… And then there was a baby and lighting and BOOOM!! And then Dofus attacked Monto and THWACK I didn’t know what happen! It AWFUL! I SPAWNED A BABEH!!! BY MEESELF!!”
Of course the stone giants did not believe him and laughed as he waddled his way back towards the main encampment to tell everyone of what had happened at their outpost. I watched as the party decided from the steps and pointed towards the way the giant ran. No doubt their next heading. What happens tomorrow could be possibly more exciting than anything that happened today or even the great cow incident of yesterday. Only time will tell.
Authors Note: I can not believe we have made it to an episode 3! This is crazy!?! Glad to continue this series and if you missed episode 1 and 2 NEVER FEAR! They are easily accessible in our archive or from Link 1 and Link 2!